1. |
Kaletta
03:02
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Get on!
In the ol' town Kaletta, had nothing better to do
She would be burning buildings, if not for parole
That kind of boredom creates misery
That kind of boredom is a killer
In the ol' town Kaletta, was brewing up new crimes
She was gonna steal some soda, with a siphon line
That kind of boredom creates misery
That kind of boredom is a killer
Kaletta with the high stiletto
You're a sneaky getter, you
Kaletta with your high stiletto
She's coming after us
Kaletta with the high stiletto
Open your trunk and throw me in girl
In the Taco Time Kaletta, had a graceless ace up her sleeve
A tube that went to her backpack, at the pop machine
That kind of boredom creates misery
That kind of boredom burns a stagnant heart
Kaletta never stops
She siphons all that pop
Kaletta, go get 'er!
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2. |
Automobile Forest
03:19
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It’s got a burnt out frame, rotten seats and smashed in windows
But still we come here again, out to the forest of the automobiles
And from this dashboard, I see through memories
They sure ain’t mine, but they’re here
We were just out to steal copper, none of us are really good talkers
Until we found this forest, full of old cars
and so we sit in this Chevy, hands on the wheel like we think we're ready
To get this thing off the ground and drive some girls around
It takes a thousand drinks, for these guys to talk about their feelings
Rum has broken the dam, and now all is for revealing
And from this dashboard, we make new memories
The cars will rust in peace, and so will we
We came across a camp abandoned, broke down the door and just imagined
Dancing happy people, across these floors
Girls look at us with resentment, 'cuz we're dorks and we just don't get it
We wanna be the dudes in the movies, with the cool cars
Our ideas of what to be, were shaped by a past
That's overgrown, and just unknown, like these cars so trashed
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3. |
Croatian Swim Team
02:28
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I'm part of the Croatian Swim Team
Been doing this thing since I was nineteen
and when we hit the showers I gotta run
I just grab a towel and then I'm done
Here comes my massive, crippling inability
To go swimming, OH GOD
I'm part of the Croatian Swim Team
I transport the water and it ain't a dream
and if you ask what excites me
I'd say a camel's storage capacity
Here comes my plastic, kiddy swimming pool
It's just for practice...
Couldn't make it as part of my own country's team
Then I tried Finland but it was a garbage dream
Italy wasn't right 'cuz I ain't a made man
Suddenly Croatia took me by the hand
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4. |
Captain Chihiro
03:11
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Captain Chihiro, your dogs are in the cages
Rattle your water cup and break that bread girl
One of these days you might wonder where the leash ends
Who turns the screws with a Dull Man's Hand
Captain Chihiro, just grab another beer
Captain Chihiro, getting wasted by the sea
Is this what I wanted to be - is this what I wanted to be
The waves clean my body but can never cleanse my soul
Captain Chihiro, I wonder if I'm happy
Or if I've resigned to a life that's just "okay"
Captain Chihiro, the answers will appear so
Get up and find them, you gotta move to be free
Is this what I wanted to be - is this what I wanted to be
The waves clean my body but can never cleanse my soul
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5. |
Mall Jail
04:57
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It started with the Garfield colouring book
That's when my crimes began fella
I'm a regular shopping mall crook
But have you heard of this girl named Kaletta
In the empty Zellers that's where I met her
Practicing shibari on a mannequin
Her Hawaiian shirt was mostly unbuttoned
and I saw the gallon of pop she siphoned
I showed her all the ketchup packets I stole
I had the planograms from Shoppers up my nose
She drew a pen swiped from the RBC
and on a Husky napkin wrote out some plans for me
We found a way to the mall Christmas tree
In a passage to Manchu Wok
In normal hours it seemed a bit too obvious to me
and we were arrested by the mall cop
She said "Do you come here often?"
"Those cuffs compliment your eyes"
I'm a regular flyer
My discount's five finger style
I make a living down at the pawn shop
Selling new CDs a buck at a time
I got a screwdriver hidden in my sock
and I'm gonna take a stop sign
We sat there hands were cuffed behind our backs
The mall cop was busy with his farmer's wrap
Kaletta would get us out of this no doubt
She jumped on his shoulders for the knock out
He's off to a place called Heaven
Between Kaletta's thighs
and now we're drinking his Jäger
and eating all the Mexi-Fries
I watch the shoppers on TV
Wearing a stolen uniform
Me and Kaletta run this Mail Jail
Us petty crooks will prevail
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6. |
Archeology
03:42
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What's old is mold, grow across the past
Your flash backs are flatulent ass
Building a whole life, on your first few years
Last time you ruled I was young
Now you ain't cool, there's no more fun
In your constant search for childhood
Digging up looking for the bones, gonna rebuild my skeleton
Life will slowly shatter it around
and I will make my throne of all of these old cereal boxes
Finally found something that's as stale as me
Archeology
If at 35 I'm playing with Bionicles
Making those old review videos
Press me against your chest and smother me to death
Please God, I ain't religious
But you can smite me if I do this
Euthanize me if you catch me making a CatDog video essay
Flipping through my memories, figure out how to relive them
Cry and order Pizza Hut, again
Oh shit! I got some nostalgia, in the folds of this cardboard
Finally found something that's as greasy as me
Rattle my bones all over the stones if you catch me with a Funko
Drop a nuke on my house if it fills with nostalgic junk
Remember when SpongeBob was good?
Remember when Halo was good?
Remember when Tims was good?
Remember when water was good? They don't make it like they used to
I'll keep these memories to myself, I'll find my past without your help
So you can fuck off with your marketing ploy
Your youth was more than stupid toys, cartoons, movies and music boy
Did you forget that? I think that you did!
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7. |
Saskatoon Cowgirl
03:51
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Get on!
I'm a farming man, from Saskatchewan
Loading up on cans
'Cuz I'm still thinking that Cuba could strike, tonight
I met a cattle lass at a square dance
Sitting in the hay
She spun a lasso across my heart, alright
Girl, I'll be your rancher
The best there is around
If you moved any faster
We'd pass the speed of sound
All I know, my crops grow
and I'm unemployed when it snows
So with you, I'll start a new
As a cattle ranching man
My parents came from the Ukraine
Looking for the wheat
So my last name isn't Polish, braski
I just Diefenbaked, some jello cake
and I'm hoping you ain't late
'Cuz my 418 is shiny and clean, oh yee
Girl, get on my tractor
The best there is around
The blade goes pitter patter
My heart beats to that sound
and then, it's back in the pen
When the winter comes again
But with you, I'll start a new
As a cattle ranching man
So won't, you take a look inside my barn
I've got Donna Summer records playing all night long
Didn't I, didn't I tell you I'm a disco guy
If I, had any friends they'd say it's fine
(Saskatoon Cowgirl)
She, left the premises
and took my heart along
I, just sit here crying
In the silo all night long
Disco, had to go
So I sing a different song
I'm left, you're right
She's gone
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8. |
Music Is Garbage
02:37
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Pop sucks
Rock sucks
Metal sucks
Punk sucks!
Reggae sucks
Country sucks
Grunge sucks
The Blues suck!
Today I got this feeling that all music is garbage
I'd rather look at Bettie Page in-
Classical sucks
Shoegaze sucks
Indie sucks
What the fuck is Grindcore?
Today I got this feeling that all music is garbage
I'd rather look upon Bettie Page in-
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9. |
Your Nightly World
04:23
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He missed the last bus on the way back home
Time to sniff the roses
Dying through the concrete cracks
The nightlife poses
Don't you show me your nightly world
Please just let me through
I don't want to give you nothing
Let me slip on through!
He meets a lady with platform shoes and chains
Midnight begins
Through her fishnets he sees a goat's skull, tattooed on her skin
"Can I get you somewhere else?
Into my nightly world
I'll take you from the cities darkness
and bring you straight to mine"
I'll run into Hell screaming
Don't care if I live to tell
and if she kills me this evening
I'll be good food for the rats
When all dignity has drained
and there's no more sense of shame
Park this empty transport
Where the dumpsters have no name
It was heard on the radio stations
We destroyed the peace in 27 nations
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Kurtis Kanttila
The Rock 'n Roll stylings of instinct.
Kurtis Kanttila is a guitarist, drummer, songwriter and singer from Northern Ontario who makes music to express his personality, longings and mundane fascinations.
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